My husband had me in stitches laughing when he came home for lunch today. I told him I had slept until 8 AM today – for the first time in months and months. I’ve been up at 6 AM most days. He told me he was happy someone got to sleep.
Flashback to last night: I’m very sleepy earlier than usual. I’m actually in bed before my husband. Let’s let him pick up the narrative:
You fell asleep so fast last night, you forgot to put on your CPAP mask. (No.) Yes. I told you to put it on because you were snoring. (Me?) Yes, you. You said you couldn’t be snoring because you weren’t asleep. But you were facing me, lying on your left side with your eyes closed, and I could hear the “aarrggccchhh . . woosh” very clearly in my ear. You must have been chilly, because you wanted to snuggle closer – and got louder. Then you rolled onto your back! The good news was you weren’t in my ear anymore. The bad news was it didn’t matter. What you lost in location, you gained in volume! Put on your mask, I said. Okay, you said, but didn’t do anything. Put on your mask! I am, you said. After a number of additional urgings, you finally put that mask on. And I’m there waiting for the machine to come on so I’ll be able to get to sleep. It seemed liked forever. Waiting . . . come on, turn it on . . . you can do it . . . it doesn’t work until you hit the button . . . I’m waiting . . . do it already! You finally did it!! I finally got some sleep.
I remember some of it – I remember saying I wasn’t sleeping; I remember putting the mask on; I remember groping for the switch on the machine. I don’t remember snoring or making any kind of noise. I don’t remember hearing my husband say anything else to me.
I guess the CPAP machine is as important to my marriage as it is to my health!