The fibro flare I wrote about in my last post is still upon me. I have to force myself to do anything – except eat, which seems to be what I most want to do all the time. It’s not that I’m hungry. I just seem to want to keep my jaws and throat working so that the muscles in my neck don’t tighten up and cause a worse headache. Plus I’m craving carbs – not good for the figure but definitely good for increasing seratonin levels. Self-medication by food.
I have so much that I want to do and even more that I should be doing. Laundry and dishes to wash. Newly discovered cousins to write to. Family history research to continue. Pastoral calls to make for church. Calls to doctors to make. Not to mention showering and dressing for a show tonight. But all I feel like doing is closing my eyes and drifting off to sleep. I seem to have misplaced my self-discipline. I’m using the little I have left to do this.
I’m trying to get myself a new CPAP machine after using the present one for 11 years. I’ve gotten new masks before, but not a new machine. I called the insurance company about covering one I want to purchase via the internet. They said that, because the company is not an “in network” provider, they could not cover it – even though I’d be saving them over $500. They’d rather pay a home-health agency to deliver one that costs more – the machine itself is more expensive and they have to pay for the service. STUPID, if you ask me.
But there’s a lot of that “STUPID” going around, isn’t there. Like Delta Airlines. Yes, they did it again. They changed the flight numbers (not times or types of planes or anything else) of 2 legs on our next trip in October, so they changed our itinerary and blocked us out of seeing the seating availability. Of course, my husband called to “re-validate” the itinerary again. This makes at least 5 changes since we first booked in June. I suppose Delta must have some reason for all this nonsense, but it’s STUPID if you ask me.
A few days ago I spoke to a cousin I never knew I had. Her grandfather and my grandfather were half-brothers. Our great-grandfather is same. We first discovered each other online, both of us doing family research. After exchanging some family history info and such, she sent me her phone number. So I called, after shoving my foolish nervousness down into my feet (come to think of it, maybe that’s why the fibro has been giving me so many leg pains this week). We had a pleasant conversation. We now have plans to meet when my husband and I go out to Colorado in October (assuming Delta stops making changes). She lives in Utah, so we’ll both drive a few hours and meet in the middle. It’s silly, but I feel all nervous – like a school girl going on a first date. I sure hope that wears off!
I have another new cousin that I’ll be meeting for the first time later this month. This cousin has the same great-grandmother as I do. This great-grandmother was the second wife of the great-grandfather noted above. So I’m related to both these cousins through the same couple of great-grandparents, but the cousins are not related to each other. This cousin lives in Rhode Island – maybe an hour away. It will be much easier to get there. I have that silly nervousness for that trip, too.
By the way, the news isn’t great on my Lakota “godchild.” If you’ve read any of the recent posts, the family had moved off the rez into Rapid City. My “godchild” had been raped by the son of a family friend. There was a restraining order on him to keep him away from her. However, as often happens in Indian families, his cousins were there to help him out. They began harassing my “godchild.” The law enforcement investigators recommended that she move back to the rez. Although it was the last thing my Lakota friend, her mom, wanted to do, she agreed. She had my “godchild” go to live with her grandmother on the rez.
My Lakota “godchild” turned 13 just the week before. She was not happy with the new arrangements, especially when her grandmother started drinking. So she stole her uncle’s car, drove to the next settlement (where they used to live), stopped answering her cell phone when she saw her mother’s number and no one could find her or the car for 5 days (this says a lot for the Rez Police). Her mother finally got the police to look seriously when she spoke with one of her cousins who happens to be a cop. (There’s that cousin thing again). Anyway, they finally found her and she’s in juvie jail for now.
I’m almost afraid to call my friend to get any further updates. None of her teen-aged daughters is home with her right now. I’m grateful I don’t have that kind of stress.
Well, I need to call the doctor on that CPAP prescription that should have been here by now. I really have to get into the shower. The coffee hasn’t helped my wakefulness. I don’t have the energy for anything.
I guess it’s time for a nap . . . . .